Love reactions.

Love grows faster when you just don't think about it. It's like putting ground bone in fertile earth, that way things get bigger and stronger, you know. In fact, I've made it survive because I don't really care sometimes. I mean, all this time, as far as my life is concerned, I ruined every special situation I got just because I'm not that strong. I wasn't born with that gift. A little while ago, I couldn't handle a relationship cause suddenly I lost interest, I was bored, I decided that relationship was too happy for me, a girl accustomed to a sad life, full of problems, discussions and arguments. While ago, someone came into my life and I don't want him to leave. The problem is me, I fear. I've fear that it may be rebuilt the same behavior that I had before, because of routines hate. I don't want to avoid the fights for fear that something bad happens, I wanna tell you the truth in the face when I'm feeling wrong. I want to insult you when you behave like an idiot and you to yell me when I'm a total jerk. I hate it when you play computer games all the freaking day, it becomes awkward when you always ask "did you like it?" after making love. I really want to hit you in the face when in less than an hour you repeat that you love me about 60 times. Because you know I love you too, but whenever you say so, then you spend it a little more, and that words have less feeling and sense to me everytime. I like to say I love you when you do something that reminds me why I'm in love with you. Cause yeah, I don't think about you all the day, but you're the first person I think when my phone rings, your eyes are the only ones that make me feel capable of anything, when I make tea on my own, I feel lonely, and those are the things that really matter, not how many times I say that I love you per day or how many kisses I give to you. I don't pretend you to take it easy, I just hope this doesn't hurt you, because nothing has changed, and don't try to handle your reaction. I want you to explode if you want to explode, because sometimes I want to.